By Not Creating an Enemy…
My "Inner Critic" was extra vocal this day. It was there on the megaphone, while also whispering in the background of my thoughts. Its focus was my ability to create the career I wanted. It was telling me all the ways my business would fail, showing me different places I should put my focus that would be "easier".
"I can't create that type of business because I am in Ireland, not America."
"I am not as good at content creation as those other coaches."
"I would have already met my yearly goals by now if this was actually going to succeed."
"Not reaching my financial goals will cause me to quit this."
"They are better than me, so I will not have what do they do."
Just some of the harsh judgements my inner monologue decided to throw my way, this day.
That was just before breakfast.
By lunch time, I was feeling sorry for myself and validating everything the inner critic was saying.
Doubling down on the doubt and disqualifying the positives.
It was only by dinner time I had realised that my inner critic was being very loud and that I was accepting it. I found more and more reasons why the inner critic was right, whether it was how someone spoke to me or a response to a social media post.
I decided long ago I would not make an enemy of my inner critic, partially because I know its job is to try STOP me from feeling bad, by keeping me away from risks or unknowns. But also because I don't WANT an enemy in my head 24/7 - 365.
So once I became aware of the negative inner dialogue, I did a quick review of the impact of these statements. Are they helping or hindering me?
In this case, the fear of not running a successful business and not having money is real and true, but the critiques are not helpful.
Next step, reframe those statements into ones that are helpful.
"I can't create that type of business because I am in Ireland, not America."
"There are successful Irish coaches, trainers and speakers, if one person has done it, I can do it too."
"I am not as good at content creation as those other coaches."
"Some are better and some are worse, but I'm building and growing, I can't expect to skip that step. I will get to that level with effort."
"I would have already met my yearly goals by now if this was actually going to succeed."
"This business is based on people knowing who I am, that takes time, but more people know me now compared to 6 months ago."
"Not reaching my financial goals will cause me to quit this."
"I have the resources to keep building for now. If those resources run out, there are options that will allow me to continue my business, while also regaining resources."
"They are better than me, so I will not have what do they do."
"I use their success as inspiration for my own. I have a track record of success over time, this will be no different."
Just walking through that process, shifted me from comparison and doubt to self-belief and action. I started to see reasons to validate this improved way of thinking.
I saw the opportunities rather than the setbacks. The value provided rather than the missed interactions.
Then the universe threw me a bone and invited me on a podcast to share my message and grow my business.
Just a little nod to say, YES - This is the mindset that brings you forward.
In short, I try not to make an enemy out of my inner critic, my skull is too small for an enemy in there.
I acknowledge that I heard what it say, then decided to reframe the point into something more helpful.
